Back again!

It has been a while since my last entry. After about a month of waiting, I was finally sent to Singapore for my treatment. Sis Joyce and I flew in on 10 November. On the next day, I saw Dr Joseph Wee. He said I'm at least stage 3. This news sadden me. It means my surviving chance is down by 10%. My treatment would be 33 sessions of radiotherapy and 3 sessions of chemotherapy. The doctor would do a review to see if I need further chemotherapy. 

I was supposed to start my treatment on 24 November. It was postponed to 1 December because the bone scan showed a white spot on my right hip/pelvis. I told the doctors it could be due to my fall. Doctor couldn't confirm the white spot after MRI. I would need to do another MRI 3 months later to confirm is not cancerous. I finally started my treatment on 1 December. On 2 December, I had my first chemotherapy. My chemotherapy lasted for 6 hours plus. First hour was dripping of saline water, then 5 hours of chemo drug drip and cleared the system with saline water and magnesium in the last hour. I had to pee at the mobile potty. The nurse needed to measure my output so that they could ensure my kidney could hold the drug. My potassium level was high so I did a blood test. My blood pressure was low initially thus delayed in starting the drip. The drip was okay till the last bit. My hand hurt a lot. When the nurse switched off the machine, I felt a hot flush rushed down from my hand to feet. I actually thought I pee-ed in my pants. Scary experience. 

The first week of RT was fine. I didn't feel anything. I only threw out on the 7th day after my chemotherapy. My mouth started to get very dry on the second week of RT. I started to have ulcers at day 10 of RT. My hair started to drop from day 13 of RT. I don't the fallen hair is from radiotherapy or chemotherapy. I just hope it won't drop a lot. I wish I'm more courageous. I would shave my hair off. I just don't have the courage. My face is darken. Freckles are more obvious. Dry skin on my face. 

I feel tired easily. I have to drink water every 5 minutes. A part of me wanting to give up so much. I still have 20 more sessions and 2 more chemotherapy. The finishing line seems unachievable.